Thursday, September 29, 2011

Medical Quotes

A hospital bed is a parked taxi with the meter running.
Groucho Marx

A physician's physiology has much the same relation to his power of healing as a cleric's divinity has to his power of influencing conduct.
Samuel Butler

A pregnant woman facing the most dire circumstances must be able to count on her doctor to do what is medically necessary to protect her from serious physical harm.
Barbara Mikulski

All sorts of computer errors are now turning up. You'd be surprised to know the number of doctors who claim they are treating pregnant men.
Isaac Asimov

America has the best doctors, the best nurses, the best hospitals, the best medical technology, the best medical breakthrough medicines in the world. There is absolutely no reason we should not have in this country the best health care in the world.
Bill Frist

As a medical doctor, it is my duty to evaluate the situation with as much data as I can gather and as much expertise as I have and as much experience as I have to determine whether or not the wish of the patient is medically justified.
Jack Kevorkian

As a physician, I know many doctors want to utilize new technology, but they find the cost prohibitive.
Nathan Deal

Doctors are just the same as lawyers; the only difference is that lawyers merely rob you, whereas doctors rob you and kill you too.
Anton Chekhov

Doctors coin money when they do procedures but family medicine doesn't have any procedures.
David Jones

Doctors will have more lives to answer for in the next world than even we generals.
Napoleon Bonaparte

Flying back from New York, the flight attendant said 'God, I wished you were here yesterday, we had a stroke on the plane. I said, if I have a stroke on a plane, I hope the pretend doctor isn't the one on the plane. I want a real doctor.
Anthony Edwards

Getting out of the hospital is a lot like resigning from a book club. You're not out of it until the computer says you're out of it.
Erma Bombeck

Growing up, my dolls were doctors and on secret missions. I had Barbie Goes Rambo.
Zoe Saldana

Honestly, being a doctor could make you more close minded than regular people.
Alex Chiu

I got the bill for my surgery. Now I know what those doctors were wearing masks for.
James H. Boren

I regret to this day that I never went to college. I feel I should have been a doctor.
Ty Cobb

I was always shocked when I went to the doctor's office and they did my X-ray and didn't find that I had eight more ribs than I should have or that my blood was the color green.
Nicolas Cage

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.
Rita Rudner

I went to the doctor and he said I had acute appendicitis, and I said compared to who?
Jay London

I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead.
Cesar Romero

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